We have heard it often said “when the going gets tough the tough get going”. I am here to differ with this saying. When life gets hard not all of us have the motivation to go on and that is ok. I say it is ok because sometimes it gets so hard that you have nowhere else to go and that is when you have to stop and re-think your strategies.While this phrase is often used as a means of encouragement, it also traps people into believing that if they do not get going in the tough times then they are not as good as those that can.
While some people may have the ability to keep pushing forward, i would offer a new phrase to those of us that are not tough enough to just keep pushing when our worlds crumble.
I would say “when the going gets tough the wise stop and regroup”. Yes i said it, there is nothing wrong with stopping and rethinking, am i doing something wrong, am i inadequate, so i need to turn in another direction and do i need to ask for advice. The problem with our society is that it has led us to believe that there is a problem with admitting to facing difficulty as it is viewed as a sign of weakness. I am here to suggest that the ability to admit to your weakness is a strength in itself and will push you to get better, it will push you to “stop and regroup”.
I find myself at the precipice of completing my Master Thesis and i would be lying to claim that when it got difficult i just became stronger and pushed harder. The truth is i gave up, i got tired, i could not write anymore at some point and i knew i needed help. My husband came through for me and gave me suggestions that were so practical they changed my whole outlook on things. He suggested some theories that he has used in Public Relations that were so relevant for Political Studies and which i would have never known had i not “stopped and regrouped”. With his input, i could move forward and when i thought about how amazing it felt to overcome my obstacle, i could not help but dance.
Do you have something in your career, studies or family life that you were so sure of that now seems to be falling apart. While there is a lot that you can do, a starting point would be to stop for a while and regroup your thoughts and ideas.
I hope you enjoyed reading my first blog as much as i did writing it and when you follow my advice and realise that stopping and regrouping actually works then i hope you dance.